SNOWY, SNOWY...ITS CHRISTMAS!!

Seems like just last week i've been home for holiday, i really can't believe tomorrow is CHRISTMAS!! woahhh!! well, im writing this not because im too lazy clean up house and set up ornaments, but im still stuck in my campus room way too far from my hometown. im still in Bintulu, duhhh.. Actually, i did plan to celebrate Christmas 2011 here but something didn't go well, but hey i still had a chance to go home and taste the homemade cook.... :) damn i really miss this homey whole things. Hope this Christmas will serve me better than previous. I don't get it, it is me or just the whole Christmas thing make everything hard on me. Theres a secret between me and Christmas..only Santa know it..HOHOHOHO (Santa's laugh). whatever might happen, i will be home tomorrow, 25th December 2011 at 11am. MTC bus. :P yayy!! while all my friends who celebrate Christmas is home right now, i wait patiently for my turn tomorrow. hope everything goin fine..i should remind myself lol! Talking about Christmas, ever heard of Mistletoe?? i know it is an evergreen leaves with berries used for deco. i did hear it on Christmas songs but just a few days ago i got an American friend who told me about kissing under mistletoe..sounds weird to me..lol! but it only happen during Christmas..but hey anything can happen during Christmas..lol. & 1 thing 2012 is just around the corner!!! time plays it part ticking to the 2012 moment..man, why everything happen so fast lately..! obviously growing up is my biggest fear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! can i be in this age forever..??? *wink* of course not..lmao. btw, i still searching.....(u know who u r) anyway, its Christmas & everyone should enjoy regardless who u r..i will keep my blog in Christmas mode until end of January..hua3. MERRY CHRISTMAS & HAPPY NEW YEAR 2012 to my readers..<3 <3 <3 <3 here's song Frosty, the Snow man for u guys..enjoy ur hoilday peeps!!

i heart Drop Dead

Last week during my class trip, i saw DROP DEAD GORGEOUS shirts on sale. I was like ' you've got to be kidding me, theres no way this place have that cool stuff '..lol. But it did!! So i dont to miss a chance to grab one. It was so damn awesome at last i had this shirt.. But i was kinda disapointed now that i should buy more than one instead!! Damn. Are you kiddin me, theres a really least of chance that anyone can get this shirt anywhere in my country. VERY RARE!! So, im just so lucky that now i owned a shirt created by our very own Oli Sykes, lead vox of BMTH.. there is a shop that sale original DDG & other cool brands that i know the only one 27 Heaven store located in KL (far away from my hometown, at least by flight to get there). So far, theres no fix store that sale original DDG here. :( Therefore, i was highly hoping that retailers in KL would at least come across to their mind to set up a new store of these cool brands in Kuching, so that more cool peoples can own themselves this cool brands ;-) That would be awesome..Drop Dead definitely one of my fav, i wonder if theres a dress & short pants of DDG :P well, i never wear my DDG shirt until today..lol!

Unforgetable Holiday Ever. (Part 1)

I never expect my 1 month holiday would be this 'amazing' lol.. Guess wat.. i experienced all the bitter sweet things this holiday. All things that i never expect to happens!! Its all start when i hopped off the plane and met my parents and drives me home..all the homecoming stuff you know.. :) Back in home, i started to do what i keep thinking to to do for a past weeks and things i should do during holiday in years back. IS TO FIND A JOB. So,i while busy search for any vacancies that fits my requirements, i have this awkward feeling. Of course coz tomorrow is my birthday..lol. I just kept it silence beside turns 20 is no fun to me right now. seriously. Then, my eyes caught something 'immediate vacancies'. So, i called 'boss' instantly...Awesome!!! I got it but i need to walk in interview first. So, all i have to do is nail the interview tomorrow and seemingly they do need stuff right now. So, thats the intro of my holiday. After i got the job, i have to find a skirt and heels because i need them for work!!! Damn, i never wear skirt together with heels. This gotta be something new to me and i'll take it. of course. My first day working is totally messed up. Just like a kid learn to first walk. It was the craziest night. I never thought this place will turn into....*speechless*. The light and laser flashed off everywhere. Almost made me sick. After a long night, i can't wait to go home. After a week, the world freakiest moment happen to me. I ran into accident while im on my way for work. Only God knows how i feel that moment. the day be my non-stop crying day for me ever. I just can't take it what just happen and i know i will give a lot of trouble to my parents. They will bear all these messed up i've done. DAMN!! I HATE MYSELF SO MUCH THAT TIME!! I guess shit sometimes slip into our happiness moments when we not aware of it. After it takes few days for me to get rid the nightmare, i run my life as normal as i can just like any teenage can be. Thats it. The end of part 1-

Here Comes The Part Where Immature People Will Freak Out :(

17..18..19..20. Those are number that no one expect to be so fast. For some reason, immature people like me (lol!!)never thought of getting adults and settle in the new phase of our life, but of course we all will ended up being adult somehow. Life gets difficult when we got older. I think that what really freak me out when the time has come for us to feel something..adulthood???? Damn.. So, this is how it feels when we're about to turn 20 huhh.. People may said its normal and . I can pretend to be cool and act like a normal, u know, like we turn 17, somehow i don't feel like to be in that phase!!! Maybe you've heard 'whats the big deal gettin 20??'..well pretty sure its a big deal because it is the part of our life.. 'cycle of life'. Too many things need to get done, huge responsibilities, being independent..Arggggg!!! too much for immature 'kid' like me. Is tis a pressure i feel??? Damn, hate it when pressure silently come, especially it doesn't come from books and notes like the one that i've spend red for this whole week. Somehow, i feel grateful and very thankful because i was given a chance to feel and be part of gettin 20 and being an adult. Just for this month, i've heard few news about a friends. That was very pity and sad. Anyway, dz morning i will go back to my hometown, Kuching and tomorrow is a big day for me but i don't feel like to enjoy the day. Hope that my family don't plan or thinking to throw a party for me. I hate surprise but i knew it can or will happen. It happen to me last year, 2 days after i got back. I cried when my mother took out the birthday cake & there goes the singing and wishing thing..hahah!!! I mean like when you will get a chance to surprise others if not on their birthday. lol. I think planning to hide in a closet on my birthday, avoid gettin noticed.lol Seriously, if i had given any power, i would choose to build a time machine, so i can go back to past and see what i've done to my life so far. IT IS HARD TO LET GO OF YOUR LIFE WHEN WE STILL CREATING OURSELVES. But, no worries, we are no. one helper for ourself. God will always be there for us :) So far, im happy with my life, being who i am, whom i live with, even life never been perfect (it is not).
 These song somehow recall how i can done better than what i've done in past. But, what is done is done!!! (that reminds me of one thing lol)

 

 Time Won't Let Go

Whenever I look back
On the best days of my life
I think I saw them all on T.V.
I am so homesick now for
Someone that I never knew
I am so homesick now for
Someplace I will never be

Time won't let me go
If I could do it all again
I'd go back and change everything
But time won't let me go

I never had a 'Summer of 69'
Never had a Cherry Valance of my own
All these precious moments
You promised me would come in time
So where was I when I missed mine?

 

If I could go back once again
I would change everything, yeah
If I could go back once again
I'd do it all so much better

Sleeping With Sirens-Let Love Bleed Red

Is it naive to make plans that seem so far away?
There's a reason I feel this way,
you're sleeping alone, I'm awake.
As you dream of me tonight, am I close to where you are?

Lay me down,
and tell me everything will be alright, things will be alright.
Lay me down,
and tell me everything will be alright. Things will be alright.
This could mean everything or nothing at all
You take what is real, I'll give you my all.

Is it naive to make plans that seem so, so, so far?
I think, "let's not wait, let's love right now.
Let's love right now."

Lay me down,
and tell me everything will be alright, things will be alright.
Lay me down,
and tell me everything will be alright. Things will be alright.

[Aaron Marsh]
Oh here where we lie, outstretched to wonder why we don't belong.
You deserve much more, and I'll give until I'm all gone.
Forever know your face and ever take your place here by my side,
like a ghost into night,
the poisoned apple to my bite.
I'll be the shadow at your door,
I'll be the moth into your light,
cause you deserve much more.
Yeah, you deserve much more.

Lay me down,
tell me everything will be alright, things will be alright.
Thunder storms could never shake us.
Lay me down and kiss me like things will be alright.
Everything will be alright.
This could mean everything or nothing at all.
You take what is real, I'll give you my all. 

Aren't the lyrics just amazing...every words just sank deep inside my blood. I Fucking Love This song. <3

Attention to Cat Keepers!!!!

5 reasons to keep your cat indoor. Take note ^_^
Many people think it's natural to let their cats go outdoors. Unfortunately, an indoor-outdoor cat's lifespan is on average several years shorter than that of an indoor-only cat. Here are five very important reasons to keep your cat indoors:

1. Disease. Cats allowed outdoors always manage to come into contact with other cats, and from these encounters they can get parasites like fleas and worms, or more serious diseases like leukemia, feline infectious peritonitis, and feline immunodeficiency virus. Light-colored cats can also develop skin cancer from overexposure to the sun.
2. Injury. More cats are killed by cars each year than are euthanized in US animal shelters. Indoor cats are safe from predators and dog packs; even with a full set of teeth and claws, cats rarely have a chance against dogs or predatory birds, and declawed cats are at even higher risk. Indoor cats are also safe from human abuse. It's unfortunate but true that there are cruel people who get a kick out of torturing cats.
3. Neighbors. Even the best cats will venture into neighbors' yards when they're allowed to roam. Your cat won't win friends by using your neighbors' gardens as litter boxes or hunting birds in their back yard. Some people have resorted to extreme measures, including poisoning, to keep cats away.
4. Wildlife. Cats are predators by nature, and even those who never were taught to hunt will eventually chase and kill birds, rabbits, and other wildlife. Studies have been done that show cat predation has a significant impact on songbird populations in some areas.
5. Getting lost. Cats that roam may be “rescued” by other cat lovers or legitimate rescue groups, or picked up as strays by animal control officers. Statistics show that of “owned” cats turned in to shelters, only 3 percent are reunited with their owners. Collars can break, and even microchips don't guarantee your cat will be returned to you. Cats can and do get lost when they get too far from their home turf.

we're INDICUS!!

Officially on April, 2nd 2011, we're Indicus competed live for Dance & Music Festival. Wow!! i am so proud of my band. Thanks to Lieliana, Ecca, Cindy & Suyong for making that night the best night of my life. we're really rock the night, girl. Indicus is the only UPMKB band for this festival. we're also the only female band compete out of 5 bands. Winning the 3rd place still sounds unbelievable for us. But, anything can happens, keep that in mind. Im speechless, we all are.. Indicus are really hardly formed. Originally, we wanna keep it 3 piece band at first, but seems really hard without bass and lead. So, we try to look any girls that can play music. (we do wanna all girls for the band). I think that is the uniqueness of Indicus. With lack of training and practice, we do almost giving up to participate, thinking that the outsiders band were much experienced and well known compared to us. We're just..u know.. pretty much like girl high school band. But, we make it, yoo!!!! Talking bout night of April, 2nd, we performed 2 songs, malay and english. First song is 'situasi' by Bunkface, our local band and 'when im with you' by Faber Drive. It is one of my favorite song, of course. So, me as a vox, i tried not to screw that night, but mistakes happens all the time. However, i think i did managed it well. Now, about the future...ermmm... maybe Indicus will look forward to compete and participate in any UPMKB events, battle of the bands perhaps. Whatever it is, academic always come first. Once again, i am so proud of Indicus!! My mom would not believe this though. lol. Lastly, thanks to all audiences who supports us that night and sing along with me.!!!!!!!!

first song, i guess

interview by the press

we're on display screen..yuuu

we're on!!

Stop the Bleeding.....

Monink, Blogger!! Today when i woke up, something had cross in my mind. I had this dream, sort of nightmare. Kinda scary..huhuhu.. So, i would like to share about something unusual. Have heard about commit suicide?? im sure we've did, one of the popular case, especially among youngsters. I don't know, but i would like to share about this matter. I think peoples should be more concern about this. But somehow, commit suicide hardly to avoid when one's had smother with a strong negative influences. How this happen??? Well, we ourselves need to figure it out... Did you know that suicide is the third leading case to death that involve mostly teenagers. This is very sad as im a teenager too. This shouldn't happen!! So, i would like to make a shout out to all youngsters out there, love yourself, don't let shit break you down, be grateful & remember there's Someone always love and watch over you that is God, our Saviour. Never lose a faith. =)

Great vid!!! 'This isn't the end' by A Skylit Drive special dedicate to all of you out there that think depressed is never end.  "STOP THE BLEEDING, LET'S SHED SOME LIGHT".

i gotta say that February is not my favorite month at all. Its the shortest month & nothing much we can do during the whole month. But, one thing special about February, none like other months is the Valentines Day.. yeahh~~ Love is in the air, babehhh!!!! What usually can be done during Valentine?? hang out with ur lover & friends?? Candle light dinner? ermmm....sounds love really fill these month.... well, i had my own dream of course..one day, i would like to travel to Japan or Rome & celebrate "festival of love" (they've got one???) there...lol.. personally, i think valentines not only for lover, but it also refers to friends & family, someone we really care & love :) Flower, chocolate. really synonym to valentines..popular gifts that usually bf gave to his gf.he3..ehem3. talking bout flowers, i like Sunflower.. but are Sunflower really goes well with valentines?? i mean many girls love roses..mostly. whatever it is, Valentines are really cool, so, why not spend the day with the person you love. meanwhile, appreciate those who love & care for us. Spread the Love, Kill the hatred..Bullet For My Valentine!!!! JK lol.. Peace..<3

piece of artwork

i luv art!!!! i reflect my sadness, happiness, joyful, tragical and others emotions through art, usually the one that i created, poems, songs, sketching, stuff that has to do with creativity (i guess??). But it is part of my past time activity. Anyway, JAMMING IS REALLY COOL!!!! lol. luv it!!!!!!! i do keep some of my artwork, & i know its not perfect, im not an artist, it shows..lol...
Btw, just want to say if you guys got something that you've created yourself, songs, poems, even if you did design a shirt, keep it, even if you think its not really cool enough, but you may be surprised one day if you look back at your own artwork...you'll smile

Remain Unspoken

feelin' hatred all over me

waiting for a star fallin' from sky

as if i wish you were here

but it remains still 

it briefly hurts 

to never see you again

to just watch your shadow

like a needles

all over my tiny heart

you will never see it

because it remains unseen

the emptiness 

that you left behind

created anonymous feeling

tightly wrapped my emotion 

that remains unrevealed

last three words 

that you always mentioned

at the end of conversation

but now it turns to dust 

while remains unspoken


-Buttercup LD-

my sketch work....lol (seriously, its funny)

Save & Love Them!!!!

Seriously, i can't live without any pet in my home. Animals plays a huge role in my life. I grew up in environment with animals ever since i was a kid. They are my best friends. Their joy just made my day especially when i having a rough time. I just can't get it why sometimes human don't love them as they want to be loved. I would like to share with you, dear readers on what is really happening to our friends. I, as a forestry student, strongly support prevention of cruelty to animals (SPCA) & PETA. I am proud to be veggie in the other hand. The best thing you can do to help animals is to stop eating them! I wish more peoples are aware of that. Yesterday, while i go through sites, i read some news on animal abuse. People who do such cruelty to animals should go to hell!!!! They're don't deserved anything from God's creation. You can check out http://www.angelfire.com/ky/holywood/page8.html . I can't believe with what i just red!!!! but this is what really happen, people. I don't have gut to go through the whole page as it tears my heart. I cry when i saw a pictures on animals being abuse. that is so totally wrong & should not happening.

The greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated.
Mohandas Gandhi 

Humans are amphibians - half spirit and half animal. As spirits they belong to the eternal world, but as animals they inhabit time.
C. S. Lewis 

At his best, man is the noblest of all animals; separated from law and justice he is the worst.
Aristotle 

Animation is different from other parts. Its language is the language of caricature. Our most difficult job was to develop the cartoon's unnatural but seemingly natural anatomy for humans and animals.
Walt Disney 

Me & Que together with his buddy, Pingu.

My beloved cats, right: Mike (died last year) & left: Kiki

Me & Que

Back to Business

After over a months on holiday, now its time to get back to the serious business ever....study!!!! Back in Bintulu always makes me think of that one thing...shoott!!! now i almost forgot that my industrial training report need to be done within this 2 weeks.....better keep all those books back on table again..lol..well, i do love reading SOMETIMES...

For real its 2011!!!!

 Ok..this is totally bothering me...can somebody just pinch me & tell me right on the face that 2010 is almost end...no!!! im totally gonna miss 2010...& hoping that 2011 will serve a better life for me & my family & friends. 2010 really leaves me with countless memories....one of the best thing about new year is that friends & family will keep text to each other wishing a happy new year especially during new year eve including me larhh...but the greatest part were able to chill with your own family....leaving behind all the misunderstood that we had before.... celebrate new year definitely exhausted....lol..anyway, HEPI NEW YEAR!!!!